Over the last week I've decided to keep a list of all the crazy things Max is doing. Not a complete list, or I'd drive myself insane, but at least some of the more memorable things or things that he's done a lot. A week in the life of raising Max. Enjoy!

1. Friday morning Max woke me up and told me he had to go to the bathroom. So he went into my bathroom and I stumbled out of bed and slowly followed after him. As I groggily try to adjust my eyes I see him standing next to my toilet but his pee is pointed straight back at the toilet instead of down into the water. When I told him to aim down, he over shot and peed on the floor and his shorts. Then in shock he started to look towards me peeing all over the wall. When I told him to point at the water he jerked back too fast and peed all over the tub and shower curtain on the other side. It was seriously a comedy of errors that morning which left me on my hands and knees that afternoon scrubbing everything up!
   
   
2. Saturday Max spent a lot of time with the men on the farm. He also picked up some inappropriate language. (Rory wasn't innocent either, she started saying "shu up".) Max? Well he saved me the biggest surprise. When we were loading up to leave the farm Dusty and I were bickering, about what I don't remember, and Max turned to me and said, "F#* you Mama"! All while pointing his finger at me and smiling as he was so proud of his new saying. I took a break and left the van before dealing with it while Dusty tried to explain how that was wrong.
1. Better yet? Dusty had to point out that Max at least used it in the right context. Oh yeah, that is just great! (He has not said it since so I think the talk he got from Daddy and then from me must of worked.)
   
   
3. Along with that fun saying, Max has decided that "crap" is his new favorite word. In our house, crap isn't a swear word. If you don't agree, that's fine, but I'd prefer that to some of the other words that are tossed around. But Max started just saying it to see if he could get a reaction. Drop his fork on the ground? "Crap!" Truck wasn't where he could find it? "Crap!" Just plain bored? "Crap!" It has settled down some since he isn't getting the reaction he wants.
   
   
4. On Sunday I brought my makeup upstairs to put on while eating breakfast since we needed to be out the door pretty fast to get to the mall in time. While I started getting Rory dressed, and Dusty made breakfast, Max helped himself to my makeup. Dusty caught him applying mascara to his eye lashes and eyebrows. 'Cause a boy needs dark eyebrows too you know! He also pulled this little trick again on Monday as my makeup was still sitting out from the previous day. (I'm learning, I'm learning!)
   
   
5. You know how your kids are mirror images of yourself? Well I must say "hunny" a lot because Max has started talking to Rory that way. If Rory is crying he's quick to run over and ask her, "Are you OK hunny?" Or if he wants something Rory has he'll call her "hunny" instead of Rory as if to butter her up first. He only does it to her so it's uber adorable!
   
   
6. On Monday Max was lying on his back with his bare feet in the air yelling at me to smell them. (They love when I pretend to smell them and proclaim them to be stinky.) So we played it a couple times and then I was talking to him. Max took that opportunity to take his foot, bring it to his face, and use his big toe to wipe the boogers away from his nose. Yes, you read that right. Big toes are apparently some pretty amazing kleenex replacements. It was disgusting, and I laughed, and he did it a lot of other times. Sue me, it was impossible not to laugh!
   
   
7. Wednesday evening Dusty gave Max a fishing pole that he had made special for Max. Dusty refused to let me buy a cheap fishing pole for him, insisting he had to make it. So while Dusty worked on his car he thought Max would leave him alone if he gave him his new fishing pole to practice his casting. Max with a real fishing pole and no supervision? Yeah, he broke the tip within 20 minutes of having it. And yes, I did say "I told you so" to Dusty. You would have too!
   
   
8. This one is not new to this week but is repeated so often I wanted to share. "Jesus" is a word I use way too much when reacting in shock. Max and I have decided it is not a good word and agreed we wouldn't use it. Max loves to tell me "We don't say Jesus. Jesus in the house." Now, this is cute, but the interesting part is that I never once told him Jesus was in the house so I'm guessing there was some holy intervention there!
   
   
9. Today we bought some kites to try to fly after the kids' naps. We were driving home and Max started talking about his kite flying. Next thing I know he's made up a little saying. "Kite in the poocey." I have no idea what a "poocey" is supposed to be and Max was insistent on saying it over and over again. I'm so thankful that was a car conversation, could you imagine my embarrassment had that been in the store?!
   
   
10. We've been spending a lot of time outdoors with the weather warming up. I was having a lot of fun showing Max and Rory all the bugs as we'd come across them, trying to get them interested in if they fly, crawl, slither, walk or other types of things. I had to stop that. Max's favorite thing to do with a bug? Squash it to see what colors pop out. It's just a bit too grotesque for me, and I still can't look at where that beetle was squished on our patio. Yuck!

So there's my 10 things I had to share. It's been interesting watching Max. I was raised with sisters so this whole "all boy" thing is just mind boggling. Obviously a lot of it is funny but it sometimes takes a day or two before I can stop being angry and can enjoy the laugh. I'm sure 10 years down the road I'm really going to enjoy this little list from one week of raising my almost 3 year old boy and if not? Well I'm sure it got a few of you to laugh!