As promised, Tara has written a nice little account of her full day with the kiddos. Please enjoy the musings of Auntie TaTa!

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To say I was a little anxious about watching two children under the age of 5 by myself for a weekend is an understatement.  There’s a reason my Mom hasn’t gotten those grandchildren she wants from me; I’m not single mom material. But, when Ashley mentioned that Dusty wanted to go ice fishing the same weekend that she was going to be out of town for her girl’s weekend I figured that it was about time that I offered to babysit, especially since Dusty has been such a team player with the random projects I have been doing in my apartment, tarance.blogspot.com.

The original plan was that Dusty would be gone all weekend ice fishing, which is why I had Ashley inform Cecil that he was not allowed to disappear. Like I told you already, I’m not single mom material… he even agreed to help after he warned me that he planned on being drunk, but hey, beggars can’t be choosers. As long as he was physically present and did not cause either child bodily harm I was more than happy to consider it a win. Friday comes and due to the weather Dusty ended up deciding to stay in town and only fish on Saturday. Worked for me…and apparently worked for Cecil since upon realizing Dusty was going to be near-ish he decided to never return after leaving for a side job at 7:30am on Saturday. Teammate tap out.

Now for the babysitting adventures: Saturday morning at 5:30am I wake up to a mini person walking in circles in the living room next to my couch bed.  I must be dreaming right?  I ignore it and it miraculously goes away only to return minutes later with a sister.

“Max, did you wake Rory up?”

“No….She woke herself up.”

“Mmmhmm. It’s way too early. Go back upstairs.” This solution wasn't much better since their bedroom/play room was directly above me.

At 7 I hear Dusty moving around and come to terms with adult wake up time. Is it too early for a Mountain Dew?

The rest of our morning went pretty flawlessly thanks to Dusty making breakfast before leaving and the miracle that is BluRay of course.

(***Ashley's note..Do you love how Rory's fake smile likes almost exactly like TaTa's real smile?!***)

Ashley had sent me the information for a Birthday Party their gym was having from 10-12 so at 9:45 I informed the kids they needed to get changed so we could get going.  Max ran upstairs excited with the promise of having his face painted. Rory? “Noooooooooo! Ta-Ta. WINGA TURTLES ARE ON!” After trying to coax her through mini melt down #1 and order her to move faster than a handicapped turtle, at 10:15 Rory finally has her boots and coat on and we’re ready to go.

Imagine my surprise upon entering the center and realizing that my niece and nephew are local celebrities. The following exchange happened at least 3 times in the first 10 minutes:

“Oh HI MAX AND RORY! Who’s with you today?!”

“TATA!”

For the record the look you’d imagine would be on their face after hearing two children call me “Tata” is exactly the look I received.

So the kids get their faces painted by some 12 year old girls with questionable art ability, but hey, the kids are happy which means I’m happy (AND doped up on caffeine considering I've already downed a Mountain Dew and it’s not yet 11am). 

Our next stop would have been the clown making balloon animals, but the line was ridiculously long so instead we got them each a bag of popcorn and hit up the art table and then headed to the gym for the bouncy house.  Max was acting kind of skittish around all the kids and didn't want to go into the bouncy house. Rory jumped right in the bouncy house screaming “WEEEEEEEEEEE!” At one point she was even cornered by some little boy and although I didn't hear what she said I saw the token Rory finger wave and knew she was taking care of business.  That’s my girl.

Max eventually played some games and joined in on the bouncy house. Melt down 2 happened when Max tried to walk out of the gym without me.  While he obviously knew his way around (He seriously has a better sense of direction than I ever will. While I can’t even remember which street to turn on, to get to the house my Grandma has lived in my entire life, at 4 years old Max was giving me directions through New Richmond to get to the gym!) So while it was clear Max wasn't going to get lost, I had no idea where things were and didn't really want him out of my sight. Especially with that many people around.  So when I told him he couldn't leave he sat down on the floor and threw mini melt down #2. Luckily it was pretty contained and after realizing I wasn't paying attention he got up and calmed down enough to tell me he wanted a balloon animal. Fine with me so I handed them their popcorn which they started slamming into their mouths so hard you’d think they were Gollum and we headed back to the clown only to realize they were not doing balloon animals anymore… On top of it being my fault we didn't wait in line for the balloon animals Rory had won a sucker at one of the games, but when she went into the bouncy house instead of holding it the whole time I just ate it.  So here I am, the aunt that ate Rory’s sucker and made Max miss out on balloon animals. There was really only one thing for me to do: Bring them to the store and buy them suckers and balloons, duh.

After lunch and another mini meltdown about how we couldn't eat anymore popcorn right now (or should I call it “my precious”) we got on our snow stuff on (by “our”, I mean they put on theirs and I borrowed a combination of winter things from Dusty and Cecil) and went outside to play which quickly turned into a sledding party. 

The only real tantrum happened after sledding when Max insisted I walk down the hill and get his sled when he was standing right next to it, because he didn't want to bring it in.  Sorry kid, not happening. So Rory and I went inside to make our hot cocoa. Well 5 minutes later I’m starting to get anxious that he’s not inside yet and look out the window to see him still freaking out. I put on my stuff, trudge outside, and tell him that the cocoas almost ready.

 “I DON’T WANNA GET THE SLED I WANT YOU TO GET IT”

“I am definitely not going to get the sled. It’s right there next to you and I am all the way over here.”

More freak-out.

“When you’re ready to bring the sled inside I’ll have the cocoa ready.”

A couple minutes later my ploy pays off and I hear him “crying” in the garage.  He then goes into his room and when he realizes I’m not following him starts following me around the kitchen freaking out yet snarling at me when I try to talk to him.

“Maxwell, I don’t know what you’re so upset about sweetheart. You have to use your words and tell me so I can understand.”

Clearly at this point he doesn't even remember why he was so upset so he grasps at the first thing he can think of, “I want popppppcorrrnnnnnnn.”  At this point I’m seriously willing to bet the popcorn is covered in crack. Luckily he’s cried himself out and agrees to cocoa with marshmallows.  

While I’m dealing with him, Rory was busy dropping a bomb in the bathroom.

“TATA I’M DONE!”

After confirming with Max that mommy does actually still help Rory wipe I go into the bathroom and she is presenting her bare butt to me like a baboon.

After the length I was able to hold my breath I’m pretty sure I missed my calling as a synchronized swimmer.

The rest of the afternoon went pretty smoothly. We even went to Auntie and Taylor’s to eat pizza so I could curl Auntie’s hair for a party she was going to.  Within seconds of getting in the car they were both knocked out cold.

Revived with the pizza and gummy worms from Auntie their energy levels returned on the way back home and while I’m explaining to Max that GG John is in a wooden box buried under the ground and that’s why no animals can dig his body out and eat it. (Seriously, not sure why Ashley even thinks these questions are that hard to answer!) Rory is singing some elaborate song about being a musical girl who likes to sing and will never stop because her sister wants her to.

At this point the day was a success and I’m exhausted. Not only have I been up for forever, but I've pretty much been a one woman show all day, so when the kids go to bed with no problem I’m beyond excited almost as excited as I was to relinquish parenting duties to Dusty on Sunday and take a nap.

Total meltdowns: 4

Total Mountain Dews consumed: 4

I’d say my ratio was pretty good, no?

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Obviously I love this. Especially when you get to the sled tantrum and Tara is saying the exact words I would be saying to the kids. And the fact that I didn't have to explain what a casket was? Priceless! Thank you again TaTa for watching the kids for us!

If you haven't checked out her blog, you should, Dusty and I both make appearances there as we're her primary help with her new DIY apartment decorating. She also writes occasionally for The St. Paul Examiner, where she actually is paid to share her words. (It's a measly amount but the more people who read her articles, the more she gets.) Consider signing up to get an email when she writes an article, I promise she's just as funny there!

(OK, enough of the sister promotions, we just love our TaTa!)