So many funny stories, so many of them completely inappropriate. They're either about pooping or Rory running away - so you've been warned. I've debated sharing some of the poop stories but hopefully my kids won't be too embarrassed or hate me too much when they are older. (Maybe they'll respect me more for all that I have to deal with.)

1)
Two weeks ago I had gone downstairs to start getting ready for the day while the kids were eating breakfast. Next thing I know Max is screaming for me to come upstairs and I can tell by the sound of his voice I'm not going to like the surprise.

He's butt naked, standing outside the bathroom, and there is poop on the carpet and more running down his leg.

In the bathroom Rory has her footie pajamas unzipped and is wiping herself. This doesn't make sense because we just took off her morning diaper since she went potty and poop already that morning. I guess she had to poop again. So it was all inside her footie pajamas, down her leg and on her hand from trying to wipe it up.

Right when I started to get the kids cleaned up I turned around to a weird noise and find Maya eating the poop on the carpet outside the bathroom door!

Maya gets put into the garage during the rest of the cleanup and I head into the kitchen where I am greeted by a very distinct smell. I smell more poop! I find a giant pile in Rory's booster chair at the table. So disgusting!

So I get that cleaned up, get the carpet cleaned up, and then have to rush the kids after cleaning them up to get dressed because we need to leave right now to get to Max's screening. (Yes, this happened that morning.)

Seriously? Do you see why I've debated sharing this story?

2)
The weekend when TaTa visited, the kids went outside to wave goodbye to her while she left. I was in the kitchen washing dishes and saw TaTa's car leave. I was outside in my pajamas within two minutes of her departure waiting for Dusty to get dressed to go play with the kids. Max was in the front yard and when I asked him if Rory was playing the backyard he said yes.

I look down at my book, read a couple of lines and look up because there is movement. It's my daughter walking down the street with a woman and young boy. The woman yells at me that Rory walked down to there house in the middle of the road. I am in utter shock. I have no idea who this woman is, where she lives, and I can't figure out how I didn't see Rory in the street when I initially walked outside.

Apparently she followed the neighbor dog down the road and went three houses down, which where we live would be about a quarter of a city block, and the woman and boy saw her and walked her back home. Now I know you can imagine all my emotions with this but add the embarrassment to the fact that this is the second neighbor I've now met in my pajamas!

3)
The following morning, I'm in the bathroom doing bathroom things and Rory lets Maya out and proceeds to follow her out the door. Max starts screaming at Rory which alerts me and I have to hurry up and get myself put back together so I can catch her. Rory was just meandering around the front yard in her footie pajamas, bossing Maya around, oblivious to the fact that going outside unannounced is not OK.

Yet another story that is pretty much only embarrassing to me but come on, can't a mom even go to the bathroom anymore?! And why does my daughter insist on running away?

4)
Max had an accident on the bathroom floor, he just didn't make it. Then he slipped and fell into his own urine. You'd think that would be the worst of it, but no. When he got up and attempted to clean up his accident, he pooped on the floor too.

I really don't know what to tell you except the poor boy had some really bad luck that day, poor guy!

5)
Rory and another neighbor dog were playing in the yard. I looked out the window and she and the dog, along with Max, were walking out toward our garden. I continued to work on dinner for a while and looked out the window and saw that she was now in the neighbor's yard behind us. (Our new neighbors that we have yet to meet by the way.)

I yelled at Dusty to go get her and by the time he got his coat and shoes on Rory was already standing at the neighbor's door. (There's probably about 3 acres between us!) For the record, I have not been letting the children outside without my supervision lately thanks to Rory's new hobby. I'm pretty sure Dusty will be joining me in this new rule now, sometimes you just have to see it for yourself.


That's pretty much the end. At least for now. I've been reading up on quite a few parenting books and I hope to be blogging my opinions on those soon too. Mainly because it will help me organize all my thoughts on the different practices because there are quite a few that contradict each other although the concepts are all very similar. I just have to believe that something will help me handle my strong willed, run away child!